Monday, April 14, 2014


I have to do it again.  April 10th I found Rula dead.

It happened much like with Neera, except the night before I noticed Rula didn't immediately snatch up a mouse to run off with.  At the time, I didn't think much of it, because I had overfed her the night before.

But, after picking up my nieces from school, I  came home and wanted to see if she had eaten.  So I go in her room, start walking to the cage, and I can see the mice in the same exact place I had put them.  Honestly, I knew right then. I just knew.  It was only a matter of finding the body.

I looked, and couldn't feel or see a body.  Then I looked at the sleepsack.  The infamous sleepsack.  The one Neera had died in last year, and that Rula never used, only - after I take it to wash - ever stuffs teddy bears into and sleeps ON top of. 

It had a lump in it, but all the usual stuffies that resided inside it were scattered around the cage.  I picked it up and looked inside, and there she was, cool, looking asleep with her tail curled over her face.  Just like her sister.

Same place, same way, and with no physical symptoms.  I think, truly, she was terribly depressed over both Neera's loss and my inability to spend as much time with her as she needed. Her final act was to get as close to her sister as she could, as she only ever wanted to do.

I don't know for sure if keeping her as a singlet was a mistake, but it most likely was.  Expanding the business was the only thing that saved Pixie, and let her live for years after Yew's death.  Maybe if I'd done the same for Rula, who loved Neera so deeply, I could have had her around for more than almost 3 years.  But I didn't, and all I know now is that she's joined Yew, Pixie, Hiko and Neera.

I love you, little one, and I just want you to be happy and with your sister again.  You waited long enough to rid yourself of that heartache.

I love you, I love you, I love you.

(2011 - 2014)


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